The Roots of My Anxiety

For most of my life, at least until the age of 50 or so, I would not have said I experienced trauma. It wasn’t until I re-entered therapy after a 7 year absence that I began to wonder if I may have been wrong in that beleif. It started with the idea that I mayContinue reading “The Roots of My Anxiety”

Definitions of Trauma

Understanding trauma is hard and the more time we spend with it, the clearer our understanding gets. Here is what I know today. “Trauma is extreme stress that overwhelms a person’s ability to cope.” – Katherin Aubrey “If danger, perceived or real causes anything that overwhelms our system, we go into an energy conservation state,Continue reading “Definitions of Trauma”

Falling in a Hole

I used to tell this story as a self-deprecating tale about clumsiness. That was when I believed in self-deprecation1. Now I tell it as a story about bottoms and something deeper than bottom. It starts with a meadow. A meadow which was connected to other meadows. My dad and I first visited it when IContinue reading “Falling in a Hole”

A New Year and a New Project

2021 was a tough year for me, but I am looking forward to 2022 as I continue my journey to develop a resilient home-base of equanimity. In fact, like I did with the 100 lakes project, I have set myself a lofty new goal which will keep me motivated (I hope) for the next stageContinue reading “A New Year and a New Project”

What I Learned From 100 Lakes

For 7 years, from 2007 to 2014, I paddled 100 lakes on Vancouver Island seeking sabi in the ancient tradition of kanjaku. Kanjaku is a Japanese word that joins leisure or idleness (kan) with loneliness or stillness (jaku). Lonely idling, or leisurely stillness. This was the term that the renowned Japanese poet Basho declared shouldContinue reading “What I Learned From 100 Lakes”

The Ball of Wire

Why This Photo? This photo contains a story about how my schema’s developed. My brother and I appear excited to visit a strange and wonderous forest. My grandparents are less excited. If you look closely, I am not looking at the camera, have a look of anticipation, but I also look distracted. I am imaginingContinue reading “The Ball of Wire”

Pros and Cons of Being Highly Sensitive

Defining Terms Sensory processing sensitivity, SPS, is the accurate term for the trait behind a HSP or highly sensitive person. SPS is my preferred term because it describes the trait, rather than making the trait the defining attribute of the person. Variability in sensitivity is common across organisms and gives rise to at lease twoContinue reading “Pros and Cons of Being Highly Sensitive”

3 Most Formative Books

3books.co is Neil Pasricha’s ambitious project to uncover and discusses the 3 most formative books of inspiring people so that he can compile a list of the 1000 most formative books in the world. I heard about the project from an interview Neil did with Dr. David Van Nuys on Shrink Rap Radio. I quickly becameContinue reading “3 Most Formative Books”

A Year of Bokeh

It started when I looked at a photo by Eden Bromfield and thought, “woah, how did he get that shot?” I’d been looking at photos for months, deciding what I was most drawn to. What type of photos did I want to take? I liked both the ultra sharp landscapes that I would later comeContinue reading “A Year of Bokeh”

Beauty Will Save the World

“Too often, beauty that is thrust upon us is illusory and deceitful, superficial and blinding, leaving the onlooker dazed; instead of bringing him out of himself and opening him up to horizons of true freedom as it draws him aloft, it imprisons him within himself and further enslaves him, depriving him of hope and joy….Continue reading “Beauty Will Save the World”